Round 7, July 15th 2017 – Dinos v Fossils in Collie

Dino vs Collie 15th July – Saturday night (du du doooo du dooo du)

A whip-crack went his whippy tail
And the beast was done
He asked us, “Be you angels?”
And we said “Nay
We are but men”
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah
Ohhh, whoah

…………little did we know that this was to become (thanks to Greeny), if not the greatest song in the world, the sound track to the weekend and I haven’t stopped singing it.

The Masters comp finally gave into popular demand and scheduled the Jurassic Juggernaut on a Saturday evening under lights. With no other games scheduled in that time slot, it was by all reports a pay per view bonanza not seen since the pre-Majak Daw Kangaroos used to dazzle under the 90s spotlights but now resigned to a lazy Sunday session or two…..anyway, enough about the aus kickers, back to the game at hand and the real game, Masters Footy.

The day was a shocker with rain all day so it was under grey skies that the bus picked up the main group from the Pav at 4.45pm with Wal in the driver’s seat. It was then onto a couple of early starters in the HaHa boys at The Parks and then the Dardy Pub where a couple of boys were comparing their claret to their Beaujolais…..a dirty day calls for some unusual pregame routines. Villa (aptly named as he was the size of a block of flats) the German, a ‘Mr Fixit’ in the Go West machine was aboard and as all Go West key note speakers, he was welcomed into the Dino den and belting out a karaoke solo before nights end.

A soggy Collie Eagles footy oval greeted us but the wind had eased and the rain stopped by bounce down. Griever jumped all over the offer to kick with the breeze but as the wind sock had been tied up for this season making game, he stuffed it right up and we found ourselves on the back foot and anchored in the left back pocket for the opening minutes. Well, after a bit a fancy footy work from one of our resident back-men formally known as Fanta or Doona or Trapdoor but now The Seamstress (after Salty noticed his advanced weaving skills), it didn’t come down much at all.

The mids, rucks and wings went to work and it was pretty clear that the Collie boys needed a Dino or two to make a game of it. Reever and Whitey love nothing more than reminding the Jurassic Allstar 2017 selectors about the place that their names need to be on that list so grabbed a Collie jumper each with Reever playing roving fwd/back/left and right wing position and DW(ag) suring up the leaky back line.

Meanwhile on the sidelines the HaHa boys were giving plenty of constructive instructional advice, footy knowledge reaped over years of ….ok, ok it wasn’t constructive or in most cases even related to footy but if I was picking up what they were putting down, there is no danger we will ever get ahead of ourselves as long as Statler and Waldorf are at the club. First game coach Shane ‘The Barbarian’ Coenen must have taken inspiration from the verbal fire that was coming from the Dino cheer squad cos the delivery he gave at quarter time was something between a David Parkin vein popper and a Mike Milkshake ‘ the Ox is slow but the earth is patient’.

The second half saw a few changes and new avenues to goal. Rolly and Condo hit the score board for the first time in their Dino careers, Splinter kicked a sensational bomb and Big Paniel Dangan showed off his strong leading ability with Benny Brown like accurate kicking and went BANG BANG. Reidy must have thought Kingy was going about it the right way recently and had racked up 4 points in a typically busy display and our other runners in Wal and Barbs were creating a nightmare for the Collie boys with their run through the middle and into the forward line.

With the game iced and the last minutes ticking down, #23 dropped a very difficult spinning ball 25m out from in form wingman Macca. As it spilled to the ground a fleet footed Rolly swooped on it and accepted the second effort sheppard offered by #23 and snapped a goal. With arms stretched to the heavens in a ‘get around me boys’ motion post goal he was heard to utter, ‘this shit’s easy’. $2

The back line deserves a big shout out, especially with only Potts and The Seamstress as regulars for only letting a single goal through. Potts was his commanding self with voice and the courage to play in front when one over the back is certain death but only it never gets there.

Over a doz goals to a single major was the approximate score line.

Presos : Splinter and Rolly as BOG

Big up to : Wal for driving the bus into the wee small hours, Gunja for doing the Prez duties, Shano Coenen for a coaching master piece and Saw Dust and Noah for running water.

The after dark on this trip was always going to be something with Collie Idol running and with the HaHas in the lead peloton and halfway up the mountain before anyone had started. A special mention to Greeny for an outstanding effort with Jack Black’s Tribute song, to Splinter as the fiddler and his ladder wielding side kick Potts, Vila sang in his second language and Hally’s twerking was right up there with the best. Incredibly we all survived, nay thrived the night and arrived back at designated pickups in the small hours of Sunday morning.

A ripper night fellas and a great warm up for The Seamstress’s 50th in a month and the carnival trip to Perth.


Keeeech Out

#23 All rights reserved

Round 6, July 1ST 2017 – Dinos v Busso Maggies at Jurassic Park



Kim Jong may have been priming his first intercontinental ballistic missile over the weekend in Nth Korea but our own explosive little package Kev Jong Pears was getting set to roll out his cannons in his big mile stone ‘50 games’ game. This package of goal kicking fury inspired a few words on his work at Jurassic Park over the past 7 years.

Our mate, Kev Jong

A frustrated goal sneak when at Kelly Park

Released forward in Masters, kicks like a dart

When I say dart, I mean just that

Never over 25m and rarely hit flat

In 2015 he stepped up as our Prez

Ruled with an iron fist, we did what he says !

Spreadsheets were flying, this man was on song

Such a stranglehold on power, we now call him Kev Jong

His Doggies are up and just knocked over my roos

If we picked our team on humility, he’d be playing the 2s

Although not the dimensions of a modern AFL player

As a clubman and pisshead, he’s a legendary stayer.

The excitement was too much for many crew close to Kev Jong with Mocha and Coach Candy Crush retreating to Coral Bay and Muzz, Mill and Hoost escaping the cold Pavilion for the warmth of Melbourne.

Under grey North Korean like skies, Busselton had come a bit light (18 players) and we had 20 so young Ads Grieve donned the black and white and prepared to take on his tangerine mentors. Barbs took the reins for the day and swung a surprise move with Juice playing off the half back which he quickly turned into a goal kicking position much to his fellow backmens’ surprise (well, ok maybe not). The moves didn’t stop there with Botty placed in the defensive goal square and Pearsy in the middle. At the end of the first stanza, we were slightly in front but given we had use of the breeze, it didn’t appear we were going to have it all our own way (especially if Wal continued enjoying stinging his old mate Donk with incorrect disposal…hot or what umpy ?!!) . Kingy was up to his old tricks again and had extended his run of singles to 9 before a mark of the day, back with the flight catch sparked a golden streak of 3 majors to complete a solid day. The back men were making it hard for the opposition with Botty putting on a kicking clinic, Pots and Fanta reading the play as they do and Condo enjoying a tackle or three. The instructions from one of our generals (Hoggs) to another down back was to keep the bark up and Pothole came to the party in spades. He was heard shouting after another Dinosaur goal,  ‘Have ya got a heart beat Dinos ?’ and has probably given the first Dino spray for not celebrating hard enough.

Meanwhile up the other end, the forwards in Shredder, Kingy, Anzac, Kevy Jong and crew were enjoying the silver service being offered by a band of operators in the middle. Splinter, Mang/Capt Jack, Griever, Macca, Barbs and Fish provided an engine room that meant the Maggies where always chasing tail. The combination of all 3 lines playing their part for 4 quarters saw most of us get a few kicks and enjoy the day.

We sang the song with Kev in the middle and celebrated an 8 goal victory which was our first ever run away win against the competitive Busso boys. It was a 9/10 performance and probably best summed up by Brook Kelly (Leo’s son) – ‘’Well played boys, today we got Dino – Tuned’

Bottles of wine : Kev and Wal

Special mention – Juice, Pothole, Greiver, Shredder, Botty, Splinter, Kingy (3 goals)

Big up to Wal for umpiring and Mike ‘Dr No’ Grieve for kicking the line marking machine into gear prior to the game. The burgers and chips went down beautifully and Rebecca Matthews worked through the night of a range of soups while her husband was celebrating the end of the financial year with his fellow spreadsheet warriors out on the town. Well done Gunja for jumping off early and sorting the admin before the presentations and for bringing down the wood for the fire. Unfortunately for those that love smoke in their eyes, it was non carbon emitting Darlik taking the points as the numbers huddled around each showed on the night.


Next game in Collie so keep ya leg warmers on boys !!!